The dollar in your wallet could have once belonged to a celebrity
If you ever want to win an argument just go “listen here you little shit”
Mom: You’re grounded
Me: Listen here you little shit
High five my tongue with your tongue
(Source: christianmingle, via clarawinchesthair)
i just had a fucking coughing fit so horrible i coughed up a piece of pasta
good thing you didn’t choke
i’d be really sad if you pasta way
i am going to shove a rusty fork up your butt
you’re getting angry fusilli reasons
(Source: krabwatch, via clarawinchesthair)




